little dreamer has something to say...

the world in a camera. the world in a lomo.

how will the world look like after it gets snapshotted by a camera?

distorted, dirty, funny, colorful, colorless?

what is real and what is not real?

I mean should we see the world through the camera, or through our naked eyes?

we impose our feelings and ideas into the photo that is taken by our camera, is it because we want to capture the best picture or that we want to produce the best picture in our hearts and minds?

To me it's just weird, I mean, with all the settings of the camera and all that, what's the worth of the real scenery?

what makes the view so captivating afterall? The real view or the photo?

I dont know, but i believe i dont need an answer, because, it's beautiful just by looking at the view or simply taking pictures of it, taking pictures, you make your own view, personalize it. So that the best view will not just happen in your dreams, but in your photos.

:)

I always find pleasure in taking photos, lomo or not, cos it's more personal, it's my thing.

I hate sharing, and I think it's ok right? I mean you dont have to share EVERYTHING, that doesnt make sense.

***

i wanna escape from this oh-so-polluted world. Polluted in thinking, in words, in life. Soo dirty, soo messy, soo hazardous.. I wanna be in my little utopia. I want to be happy.

Has LPC given me the new insights in life? Yes. Has LPC made me stronger? Yes. But what am I getting out of this two years of education?

Ivy leagues? Better paid jobs? Financially secured future? Fame? Power? Happiness?

I mean it's ok to be not too good at academics, and get into a decent uni and get a job somewhere, somehow, right? it's just it seems like my education shouldn't be paid off this way. It's not equally measured in terms of time and money. Yet, seems like I am no where near getting into an IVY with my current PG and SAT scores. geez i am scared. All my life I have been striving hard to go to these schools, but seems like my current situation tells me...the opposite. THAT'S BAD. BAD BADDDD :( what to do? I am confused. I am scared.

Where is my guiding light?

B.